I get it, I get it. Staying up all night is bad for your health, and all the fancy studies show that it can affect your performance in school for up to four days after. Blah, blah, blah. I know. I also know that I have three and a half essays to write, two tests to study for and six tons of homework to do, all of which need to be completed by 8 a.m. tomorrow. It’s nights like these when I just need to smear war paint on my cheeks (which is totally not old mascara that I cried off an hour ago), break the Guinness World Record for Highest Stress Bun while I cry/sing to Eye of the Tiger and work until the crack of dawn… with all of the necessary snack breaks, of course. Here are some of the best snacks to keep you up when you just have to pull an all-nighter.

1.       Caffeine. I don’t know why people say drinking (seven cups of) coffee in order to stay awake will only make you crash in the end. I say, you can’t crash if you don’t stop drinking. Hey, a Marlborough girl has to do what a Marlborough girl has to do. Also try some ice water in between every cup, or not depending on whether you think you have enough time to pee.

2.       TRAIL MIX. It’s tasty, quick and (moderately) nutritious. The dried fruit and the nutty goodness will keep you energized and focused. I recommend eating some with chocolate chips in it to fool yourself into thinking there is still good in the world.

3.       Bananas! Almost any type of fruit will work as well, since most of them are loaded with natural sugar. I love bananas because they aren’t messy and they are incidentally loaded with vitamins and, like, minerals or something. Fruit in general is also healthy enough that it won’t add to the overwhelming feeling of #awfulness you will inevitably feel in the morning.

A few caveats:

1.       Carbs. No. Just no. The carbs in nuts and fruit are not a problem. I am talking straight up grain here. While it may be tempting to stuff your face with lasagna or, say, a red velvet cupcake, stay far, far away. Yes, carbs are super delicious but they are also pretty self obsessed and will actually try to shut your whole operation down just so you can fall asleep and focus all of your energy on their digestion.

2.       See #1. No, seriously.

And with that, best of luck and Happy All-Nighters to you all!